Shadows, searching in the night…

There’s something about Don’t Stop Believing (the Glee version) that just makes me want to be productive. There’s also something about Lea Michele that makes me regret the fact that I stopped singing years ago.

When I’m not doing homework, laundry, cleaning, reading, blogging or sleeping I’m researching the publishing world. I’m part of a few writing critique sites asking questions, reading articles and just trying to figure things out. I’m not the type to research before diving head first into something but when it comes to writing I’m super hesitant. Which makes no sense since I’ve been writing (stories) since I was old enough to read.

But the stories I wrote as a kid are so much more different than the stories I’m trying to write now. My stories back then had no real plot, had no driving force and the characters were barely people. They pretty much based on just one emotion.

While I’m pretty good at making people up (I have exes that can confirm this), I for some reason can not make a character. I can’t write someone who’s suppose to be real. I can’t come up with quirks or traits or anything. It’s sort of like playing The Sims and sticking to default. I can come up with a plot, with twists, with conflict but I. Can. Not. Make. A. Damn. Character. This seriously baffles the hell out of me.

So right now I’m reading over my outline. Over and over and over and doing auto pilot things in hopes that my character will just come to me. But she’d rather be sitting over there *points at girl in dress sitting on a rock* and not speaking to me. How are you on non speaking terms with someone you haven’t even met yet?! Grrr.

Until D gets up to talk to me, I’ll be outlining my next idea. Which always presents itself right before I fall asleep and disappears when I wake up like it’s some game. Like it’s the Cheshire Cat or something. Grr. I had a slight idea to write novella’s of people/things I know in real life just as some sort of practice. I think it’ll be a good idea. Do you need to outline novella’s? I guess it’s up to the writer.

… then my mom walks in to say something pointless & I lost my train of thought *sigh.

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