You were fun 2018

2018 started off a bit sad — we lost the first Baby Lo at the end of 2017.

But 2018 was overall a fun year. Despite not being able to travel but we went on so many fun adventures! I have so many fun memories to pick from that fitting 12 photos was so hard!

This year tested Bubba and I’s relationship more than the rest of the 2 years had and I absolutely admire through those two huge fights we had this year that he never once made me feel like I was crazy or that I was overreacting or that my feelings weren’t valid. I appreciate that he listened to me bitch him out for as many days as I did and that at the end of it it all; he made moves and he made choices to make the situation better and he does everything he can to make sure my anxiety has nothing to say. That effort alone goes above and beyond anything I have ever experienced and I’m always so very thankful for him.

Of all the gift sets/holidays of 2018, I think Valentines Day had some of my favorite items while Easter was my favorite theme!

I got these two beauties!

The metal figs set on the left is one of my favorite figures, period. I love the weight of these items and I love the way Aurora looks. Maleficent as a dragon has always been my fav, period.

He also gifted me the Poison Apple perfume that I had no idea even existed on the right. It smells like D-Street for starters (one of the first Disney locations I ever worked at) and I have a super sweet spot for Poison Apples (I also worked at Candy Cauldron).

I love how every gift he gives me has so much thought in it.

Recap 2017; Top 7 Favorite Food Finds

I thought writing this entry would be easy… but as I was (endlessly) scrolling through my photos of food of 2017 I realized… this isn’t going to be as easy as I thought.

In my mind 2017 was divided between the last bit of my life in Florida and the beginning bit of my life in Texas; through Ubereats I discovered a lot of food I fell in love with before I left Florida and through DoorDash and adventures with Bubba there’s a lot of food I discovered in Texas. But I tried to narrow it down to the foods I would go back to. So while this isn’t a complete list of foods I found to be my favs this is a list of foods I loved enough to buy more than twice.

Let’s start with what I discovered in Florida:

2017 Recap

I’m a little sad this blog doesn’t have more yearly recap’s like this one I did for 2012, I know the last few years have sucked but damn. That bad?!

I tend to do this graphic every year… or I have the last few years but I honestly can’t remember where and if I actually post them! Oh gosh, I should fix that some time soon huh?

This year, though I’ve already recapped it here wasn’t very big on discovering much. At least… not as much as I would had liked. But then I don’t think I’ll ever really be happy with how much I discover since I want to discover ALL THE THINGS.

I’m going to try and copy that blog posts format as well though.

⇢ Favorite Book
I read less than my goal of 36 books this year but I did manage to finish The Lunar Chronicles thankfully! I didn’t find a book I really would consider a “favorite” this year. I did really like Tentacle & Wing but I haven’t written a blog review for it yet but you can find my Amazon review for it here.

⇢ Favorite Movie
I admit I haven’t watched very many movies this year. According to Bubba I only watched 3 in theaters which were Beauty & The Beast, Power Rangers and Wonder Woman. Though if I had to pick, I’d say Wonder Woman was my favorite movie of the year.

⇢ Favorite TV Show
We restarted a bunch of older TV shows like New Girl and Glee and we’ve been watching The Food Network lately while we eat but we started Avatar this year also. I introduced him to Fairy Tail and he introduced me to The Devil Is A Part Timer. There’s also Ouran Host Club. I’d say The Devil Is A Part Timer was my favorite show of this year.

⇢ Favorite Song
According to Spotify Bahala Na by James Reid and That’s What I Like by Bruno Mars were my top 2017 songs lol. But I’d also throw in 2U by Justin Bieber and I Want Crazy by Hunter Heyes is pretty up there.

⇢ Favorite Video Game
I think I played way less games this year than last year. There aren’t any games that stand out — I still played FFXIV but I started slowing down after Stormblood came out and stopped pretty much completely after I moved. I got back on Animal Crossing for awhile but then stopped. So, I don’t know. I guess if I had to say it would be Sims 4 for PS4 cause I could stay on that game forever.

⇢ Favorite Discovery
Caldo de Res and Coconut Milk from El Rancho…. annnnd a bunch of shopping centers here in Texas like Legacy Hall and Clearfork!

⇢ Favorite Makeup Item
The Too Faced Glitter Bomb palette, Urban Decay Naked Heat palette, Victoria Secret lotion in Cloudberry and the Chapstick cube lip balms in Cotton Candy!

⇢ Biggest Achievement 
Getting Julep Ambassador, getting on the Target website with a candle product shot, moving to a different state by myself.

⇢ Favorite Moment
Me: I was gonna ask for a promise ring but I thought that would be lame
Bubba: Why do you need a ring when you already have the promise *kisses my ring finger*

Pretty much every weekend since I’ve been in Texas too.

My OCD backing off when I first moved in. But of course it came back, as it always does. I need to find a trick to get that to stay at some point.

⇢ Favorite App
Besides social media I haven’t really discovered any this year. But I’d probably say Instagram and Pinterest.

My {onelittleword} this year was [ G R O W ] and I was still in the process of healing from various other things. I was still trying to get things together and figure things out. I tired to get myself to discover new things and go to new places and I think given the point in my life where I was at I did pretty damn good and there are moments I made massive progress. Like when I first moved in and my OCD wasn’t AS bad; I didn’t have to wash my hands all the damn time and I was able to put books and stuff on the bed without freaking out. I wonder why it’s like that, it’ll be almost gone when I move to a new place and the moment something stressful happens it comes back. Like wtf. Argh. Also having my own place is nice. Like a place that’s finally JUST MINE.

There were a lot of great things that happened this year and a lot of great things I discovered and a lot of great moments.

I hope to discover more things, more places, more favorites and to be an even better version of myself next year and I can’t wait to see what I’ll discover!

Goodbye 2017

If I had to rate 2017 on a scale it would probably be a 9/10. Overall, it was a pretty great year and it was one of the best years I’ve had in a really really long time.

I’ve gathered almost 80 photos for this post, but I’ll try to cut that down as much as I can. Though as I’ve said before, this blog is primarily used as an archive for myself 🙂

Top 5 Songs of 2016

I try to do one of these every year. Here’s the one I did for 2015. It’s always interesting to see what music did I listen to the most that year and with the help of Spotify I can look back without having to really think too hard. Although the list isn’t 100% accurate it’s still a bigger help than relying on my own memory lol! It doesn’t say what I listened to in the very beginning of the year but it does list some of my most listened to jams. Narrowing it down to 5 is gonna be the hard part!

Jealous by Beyonce

I was going through some stages of jealousy earlier in the year and this song along with Feelin Myself really helped me cope with that especially since I wasn’t “allowed” to talk about being jealous. Some people just aren’t worth your time and I get that now, thaaaaaaank god.

Oh also! Can’t forget Formation by Beyonce. I immediately fell in love with this track! So much that since I couldn’t find it I straight bought it on iTunes and played it non stop for weeks. I did not come to play with you hoes, I came to slayyyyy bitch!

Latch by Disclosure

This I would say was the one jam that I had on steady repeat for months. I still listen to it now. It reminds me of a brand new start and just good feelings and good times and lots of laughs. Religious by Ne-Yo does that too. Mostly of 6am morning talks that spanned all day long and talking about how I should own Nikes. Whatever lol.

Wind It Up by Todrick Hall

Picking the Todrick Hall jam of the year was a hard one considering that I’m IN LOVE with his whole Out of Oz album. Todrick was a discovery for the year thanks to my boyfriend Penny who introduced me to him during our nights we’d watch and share YouTube videos with each other. But I thought it was only right to go with the first song I was introduced to which is still one of my favs! And can we just talk about how he slays that Teddy Bear outfit? Like… can I do that?

In case you were curious to know what my favorite track from his Out of Oz album is… just gonna… leave this here.

Company by Tinashe

I fell in love with this song and this was another discovery for me. It just has that beat to it and it makes me miss my life in Cali — going to clubs and doing hoodrat shit with my cousin in San Francisco causing trouble and swerving on people. I should really take a trip back home soon! This video also inspires me to go to the gym and run my ass off. I’d love to be one of those sexy skinny girls instead of just… a skinny girl.

All Be So Simple by Mike B.

I fell in love with Hip Hop Jazz and I hella added this after I finished this list, but whatever! I HAD to include it in this list! This song opened up a whole new world for me and maybe a lifestyle change. I love how calming this track is. I just hate how I can’t find it on Spotify or anything, it’s just on Soundcloud and YouTube *sigh*.

Crush by Yuna

Another discovery thanks to my friend Chewy/Jessica. I immediately fell in love with this song that she suggested after I said I was looking for Hip Hop Jazz jams (which is another discovery!) and I just love that old school R&B vibe it gives off. Helps that Usher is on that track and actually singing too. Oh how I’ve missed old school Usher!

How Far I’ll Go from Moana

Okay okay, I had to include this because of REASONS. Reasons that I should just write a whole ‘nother blog post about. Like, this whole movie soundtrack was amazing! But this song is one that me and Penny would heavily repeat for like weeks. We’ve just now weened ourselves off of it.

Cause yo, yo… there’s a line where the sky meets the sea… and it calls me.

I definitely like the reprise version better though.

Yeah, I think I’ll write a whole ‘nother blog post on this cause it was just THAT good.

H O N O R A B L E    M E N T I O N S

Love Is an Open Door from Frozen

The Feeling by Justin Bieber

YouTube Hip Hop Jam

Feeling U, Feeling Me by Alicia Keys

Headlines by Drake

Dear No One by Tori Kelly

Buried Alive by Logic

Jealous by Nick Joans

Closer (cover) by William Singe

I’m glad I found so many different songs that I fell in love with. I love how there’s a string of songs that describe the timeline of me and Penny’s relationship.

What were some of your favorite songs of 2016?

Hello 2017!

Seven days in and I’m already slacking!

Goooooooosh.

This year my #onelittleword is [ g r o w ].

And I have a lot of growing to do. As hard as that is to say. But the truth is, the last two years have been a huge huge mess. And I have a lot to think about and a lot of rediscovering to do within myself.

I’m usually really good at coming up with goals and resolutions for the upcoming year in November. That didn’t happen this time around and I’m struggling with not being disappointed with myself.

2016 was a really hard year. I wish I had recorded more of the hard part just so years from now I can look back and say I can’t believe I picked myself up from that. Depression and struggle use to be my driving force to write. It was my therapy my whole childhood. Why did that stop now? Because the subjects and topics were too controversial? Because I was afraid of offending people? Because people are less understanding and less forgiving when they don’t know the situation? At the end of the day their opinions don’t sleep in my bed or dictate my life. I use to be this blunt, straight forward, idgaf kind of chick and I loved that about myself… then I got scared. And people shouldn’t change who you are, no matter WHO they are.

What do I hope to accomplish by the end of 2017?

Growth.

Mostly.

• I hope to read 36 books
• I hope to be able to create a recap video like this one
• I hope to have a damn near regular blogging schedule
• I hope to revamp my hazearella instagram feed
• I hope to be more active on my hazearella twitter
• I hope to build hermagicandmadness
• I hope to discover 5 new resturants (yeah we’re back to this)
• I hope to level my FFXIV Axelyn‘s WHM, BLM, CUL, Fishing, Mining and Weaver to 60
• I hope to take more pictures
• I hope to film more of my life
• I hope to film more YouTube videos
• I hope to incorporate more Hygge into my life
• I hope to learn more French
• I hope to incorporate meditation back into my life
• I hope to discover more favorite’s
• I hope to start making lists again
• I hope to tidy my life
• I hope to take one step closer to figuring it out

 

I don’t have any extreme goals like I normally do. And I’m sure I’ll add more goals as I think of them. I’m trying to be more realistic about my goals and I’m trying to learn to trust the process as much as I don’t enjoy it.

So here’s to making more memories at 2017.
Finding more joys.
Discovering more favorites.
And growing.

Hello 2016

2016.

Wow.

Me and you WordPress have been in this for 5 years.

Insane.

I usually have this insane burst of creativity to goal make until my finger falls off when New Years comes around. This year I’m kinda just… whatever happens, happens. I didn’t even partake in my usual traditions last night. Mostly because I was tired by 9pm and already ready to go to bed (is this what getting old feels like?!) but Nick wanted to stay up until midnight, which of course he did because he can’t sleep anyway.

So we played Mortal Kombat and watched the countdown go on. He got out the sparkling apple cider and the fancy glasses. When midnight struck we took pics then kissed haha. Then I went over to snuggle Sophie and give her kisses too.

She’s now sleeping in her cat bed next to me. It’s been awhile since she’s slept in her cat bed, and next to me. She’s been kicked out of the bedroom because she decided to take a kitty stand and pee AND poop on the bed. In the covers. To which I did not discover until after I had taken a shower and was curled up in bed. Also, I did not notice that she had pooped on my sleep shirt I was wearing either.

Great aim Sophie Bear, great aim.

I’m still trying to figure out what’s stressing her out and causing her to act out.

I made one of these last year too. A much angrier version.

But instead of doing “resolutions” this year, I’m doing goals and of course #onelittleword again because I kinda like the idea.

This years word is Focus.

Nick likes to remind me everything that I’ve accomplished and endured in 2015. Saying that I did great and that I did more in one year than he could ever imagine. But yet it doesn’t feel enough. I didn’t cross anything off my list except for adopt a pet. Oh and I graduated. But I didn’t read more than 10 books (out of the 50-60 I usually aim for), I didn’t learn to make Macrons or Marshmallows or plushies.

My word for 2015 was Rediscover and I think I did a good job of keeping that word in mind through out the year.

So some of the key points of 2015?

• Finally filing for divorce
• Adopting Sophie
• Successfully navigated through Tinder
• Met a boy
• Moved an hour away from home
• Created a life in another city
• Found a second family that accepts me for me
• Graduated college
• Grew my twitter and instagram following
• Stopped depending on Zoloft
• Made new friends
• Got my hands on the Rose Gold iPhone (thanks babe!)
• Survived my first year of divorce despite the fact I’m still dealing with debt my ex husband left behind and the fact he sold a car I could had totally used and had put in money for while we were still married so he could move to Australia to move in with his 22 year old girlfriend who he was cheating on me with all of 2014 when she was interning at Disney here and who he said was “just like his little sister”. Yeah she doesn’t look like that when she’s sitting on your lap wearing a red dress with her boobs hanging out. Gross. AND I had to find this out for myself because he’s a pile of shit.

 

Thank goodness my life would never suck so hard I would have to leave the country just to survive. Sometimes I make some really shitty choices. Like who to date/marry.

I have a list of goals I hope to achieve this year (in other news…) and though this isn’t the complete list, it’s some of the more important goals.

• Start blogging more/start making YT videos again
• Continue to build instagram/twitter audience
• Start meditating again
• Try 5 new eats
• Read 50 books
• Start a savings account
• Move
• Travel
• Excel in school (I’m not done just yet!)
• Learn to make Macarons
• Learn to make Marshmallows
• Learn to make plushies
• Learn how to trade Forex
• Relearn how to play the piano
• Learn Spanish
• Learn a bit of Japense
• Touch up on Tagalog
• Touch up on Cebuano
• Touch up on French
• Touch up on makeup skills
• Stay more active
• Stay on top of things

I need to work on purging some stuff and organizing my stuff much more better. This clutter is starting to really get on my nerves.

The fact that I’m no longer on Zoloft is amazing. I mean, I still get anxiety and I still get that kind of anxiety where it feels like someone is stabbing you in the chest and twisting slowly but my anxiety isn’t half as bad as it use to be. I’m very lucky. The withdrawal only took about 3 months to pass too.

So here’s to a new year waiting to be filled with new accomplishments and new adventures!

Re-Capping 2012

Unlike 2011, not many exciting an amazing things pop out for me when I think of 2012 and while I’ve had this blog all through most of 2012, I wish I had actually blogged more.

— Favorite Book
This hands down has to go to Unspoken by Sarah Rees Brennan. I ship Kami/Jared so hard and I can not wait for Unheard to be released next year. Other favorites include The Marriage Bargain by Jennifer Probst, Breaking Beautiful by Jennifer Shaw Wolf, I’ve Got Your Number by Sophie Kinsella and Spell Bound by Rachel Hawkins (obviously).

— Favorite Movie
Uhm. The Avengers! And What’s Your Number? Oh and of course The Hobbit! That riddle scene? OHMYGAWH!

— Favorite TV Show
Sadly I didn’t watch that many this year and I didn’t get around to watching most of the ones I wanted to watch but I’d have to say New Girl!

— Favorite Song
Beauty & The Beat by Justin Bieber & Nicki Minaj. Also We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together by Taylor Swift. And Blow by Ke$ha. Upbeat and happy!

— Favorite Video Game
Probably Skylanders or Castle Crashers 😛 definitely BeJeweled Butterflies and Dynasty Warriors for PS3! I would also say Little Big Planet 2 but that game was way shorter than I thought it would be

— Favorite Discovery
SALTED CARAMELS. I have been missing out my wholeeeeeee life!!! Also I’ve grown pretty fond of Petaluma, CA as well… also Tea! SleepyTime Tea mostly! And honey. With tea, without tea, whatever!

— Favorite Makeup Item
Granted I haven’t tried a lot this year like I have in previous years but E.L.F Mineral Eyeshadow in Sweet lets me get away with not putting on eyeliner and any time I had to put on makeup it was usually that. I wish I could be cliche and say my Urban Decay Naked Palette but we’re still trying to discover our relationship together. Also Essie nail polish in Eternal Optimist was my go to nail polish!

— Biggest Achievement
Uhm… getting a B in Algebra II I guess. But honestly my B in Religion was my biggest achievement. That was the best class I’ve ever had in college.

— Favorite Moment
Christmas Eve (:

— Favorite App
Shopkick! And Triple Town! Both apps of which M found for me 😛 Tiny Tower and Dragonvale are honorable mentions since it got boring after you reached a certain amount of money

So while 2012 wasn’t as exciting as 2011 there were still some pretty snazzy highlights. Like M crocheting me my favorite type of beanie (he even looked it up and everything), adopting Snow as well as Chammy and Choco Bear, meeting Chris Colfer at his book signing, getting a Kindle Fire :P, completing my goal of reading 50 books this year (I actually went over!), giving into my addiction for Root Beer, making progress on both my Alice in Wonderland and Wizard of Oz re-telling (but then I stopped…), going to Vegas for my birthday (even though that’s tradition really, I still enjoy it!), going to Disneyland for Halloween, having a wonderfully happy Christmas Eve with my family and having a wonderful 3 year anniversary dinner/stroll with M. I didn’t even have to remind him to get the day off from work or set the reservations. He did it alllll by himself!

Of course there were parts of 2012 that sucked like my damn procrastination, messing up my FASFA (though that was mostly my academic advisers fault!), OCD panic attacks, not reading all the books I had planned on reading, my room is still a mess, and not being more organized. But those are all things that can be fixed. Except for the OCD part.

So with that, it’s been real 2012. I can’t wait to see what 2013 has in store!